It is important to a little girl’s developing self image to have positive view of herself including her hair. Curls and coils are beautiful. Your daughter’s hair is beautiful. No matter what type of hair she has, you both can learn how to manage it.

General Care and Maintenance

Taking care of curly, coily or kinky textured hair is not hard, if you know what you are doing. By following some simple guidelines taking care of your daughter’s hair can be a pain free and pleasant experience.

Washing

Next to comb-outs washing has to be one of the most dreaded experiences for children with curly, coily or kinky textured hair. But it doesn’t have to be. The first thing is to decide if you really need to use shampoo every wash.

Many ethnic women are finding that their hair is easier to manage when the skip the shampoo step and just conditioner wash their hair. Unless your little one just rolls around in the dirt or helps daddy with the car her hair probably doesn’t get so dirty as to warrant the weekly shampooing.

If you don’t want to do away with shampooing all together try doing it less, like every other wash or once a month, and see how your daughter’s hair reacts.

Tangle free washing

You spent all that time untangling your daughter’s hair last time you washed it. Why wash tangle in this time? If washing and detangling your child’s hair is a tramatic experience, try this tangle free washing routine:

• Section her hair into four or five sections with some Ouchless ponytail holders.
• Apply diluted conditioner to each section one at a time and comb through. You may want to put a towel around her shoulder.
• Be sure that each section is tangle free before moving on to the next.
• Once that is done you are ready to wash.
• If you are going to use shampoo focus on her scalp only and leave the conditioner to protect her ends and keep them from tangling. Or massage her scalp with your finger tips to dislodge any dirt and rinse out the conditioner.
• If you gently smooth her hair in the direction it grows and resist the urge to rub it roughly she will have less tangles in the end.
• When you are done you should be able to comb it easily with a wide tooth comb.

Drying

Just one note on drying your child’s hair after you wash it. Whether you use the above routine or not, blot your child’s hair dry. Rubbing it in different directions only promotes tangling. A little wetness with some detangler/leave-in-conditioner is good if for combing out her hair .

Detangling

• Always detangle hair dampened never dry.
• Use a wide tooth comb and spray on some diluted conditioner/detangler.
• It is best to divide the hair into sections and detangle small sections of hair instead of the whole head at once. Remember to be gentle.
• Start at the tips of the hair and work toward the roots. Be sure to hold the root firmly to lessen pulling pain.
• When you get a section detangled, braid it or twist it so that it doesn’t get re-tangled.

Helpful Tools

Here is a list of helpful styling tools and products:

• Snag-Free/Ouchless ponytail holders
• Wide tooth comb or pick
• Rat tail comb for straight parts (optional)
• Natural bristle brush
• Moisturizing Conditioner
• Clarifying Conditioner (for heavy duty washes)
• Hydrating shampoo (If you decide to use shampoo)
• Daily Moisturizer for comb outs
• Light natural oils
• Cream hair moisturizer

Styling Your Daughter's Hair

Styling your little girls hair should be a joy and not a chore for either of you. If you find styles that work with her hair’s characteristic it will be easier to style and enjoyable for your both.

How you style your child’s hair will depend on how old they are. When she is old enough to take interest in how she looks you might consider asking her for input in how she wants to wear her hair.

Some rules of thumb:

• The smaller the sections the longer the style will last.
• Braids and cornrows last longer than double twists and flat twists.
• There for ten straight back cornrows will last a few days longer than two twists on either side of the head.

The Joys of Braids

Natural braids offer an endless amount of styling possibilities. If you don’t know how to cornrow you and connect braids in a row.

Braiding tiny braids may take a longer but they last and you can style them like hair. Try box braiding your child’s hair into ½ in box braids. Now you can set them on rollers, cornrow or French braid them or pull them into a pony tail or buns.

Be creative. You can keep natural braids in for up to a month. Just wash here hair as usual. And consider letting her wear a braid out when it is time to take the braids down.

Cornrows

Next to braids cornrows are a natural home stylist’s essential. They are long lasting and the basis of many natural styles. They can be combined with braids, twists, or bantu knots. If you cornrow your child’s hair small the style can last a week or more.

Twists

Twist can be done large or small. Smaller twist can be styled in some of the ways mentioned above. You can cornrow or flat the front of her hair and put twists in the back. Use your imagination!

Twists were my mother’s style of choice for me when I was young. I still like them today; I just do them much smaller.

Free flowing (Afros and Puffs)

I think every little girl should be able to wear her hair completely loose or in a puff at least once in a while. It reaffirms the fact that her hair in all its natural glory is beautiful.

Bantu Knots

Bantu Knots are another fun ethnic style. They can be mixed with cornrows, flat twist, and twists. They are a great hair stretcher (style that naturally loosens the curl). She can wear them up for a while and then take them down for a knot out.

A Few Words on Relaxing Children’s Hair

There is really no reason to relax a child’s hair. If parents will educate themselves on how to take care of their children’s beautiful locks, they will not need to resort to chemicals to control them.

Relaxers send a message, “Only straight hair is good, everything else is bad. My hair is not straight so my hair is bad.” Do you really want your child to hear that spoke or unspoken message?

Biracial Children’s Hair

I sympathize with mothers of biracial children. I have friends with mixed children, friends who are mixed, as well as family members who are mixed or have mixed children. I know that the hair issue can be hard whether you are a black or white mother. Most of the tips above should be helpful. Here are some other points to remember:

It’s curly not dirty. Straight hair may need to be washed every day but ethnic hair doesn’t, once a week is usually good. And try a co-wash instead of shampoo.

Ethnic hair is delicate and fragile. Always use wide tooth combs and natural brushes.

Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize! Use cream products instead of holding gels, mousse, and hair spray.

To avoid comb-out tears reread the section on detangling.

Conclusion

No mater what hue her skin or texture her hair your daughter is a special unique human being. Help her always remember that by caring for her hair in a way that makes her happy to be born with the hair she was given.

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